I found myself sitting on the floor of my garage the other day, alphabetically sorting two years’ worth of the artists pictures and bios that regularly come in the mail. Surely youâ€™ve been in the same position.
Several thoughts struck me as I sorted through the massive stacks. Among them:
1 )How come in every one of Celine Dionâ€™s pictures, you canâ€™t see her chin?
2) Jeez– in the only picture of that Palace guy where he isnâ€™t wearing a hat, his head looks like itâ€™s the size of a basketball!
3) If I stick Tha Dogg Pound under â€œDâ€ and Da Brat underâ€œB,â€ where do I put Dis â€˜Nâ€™ Dat?
4) Boy, the guys in this band sure look like dorks!
Later? I played Tomb Raider and enjoyed a sparkling Diet Coke!
BUSH Razorblade Suitcase (Trauma) Speaking as a human who thought Nirvana were no great shakes, let me gladly point out that I much prefer Englandâ€™s Bush–a viewpoint which I gather is unpopular among todayâ€™s critical establishment. Darn it! Producer Steve Albiniâ€™s legendary prowess as a guy who can turn on a tape recorder with the best of â€˜em actually provides a service here to Bush; the music sounds live and rough, exactly the way the band intended it to, I suspect. Too bad–if theyâ€™d used a real producer, this wouldâ€™ve been a better, more dynamic album. In closing, several of these songs truly rock–though all of them are marred by singer Gavin Rossdaleâ€™s good looks, and the horrifying thought that many beautiful women must throw themselves at him regularly when they could be going out with handsome male rock critics! 4/5
SLOAN One Chord To Another (Murderecords/MCA Canadian import) Soon to be released on Tom Zutautâ€™s new Enclave label, the third album from lovable Nova Scotians Sloan stands heads and shoulders above their previous recordings for Geffen. Literally ! A zesty mix of aggressive pop smarts and â€™60s-inspired arrangements, this disc pops with a cleverness and inventiveness that never verges on novelty-for-noveltyâ€™s sake; hear it and I guarantee youâ€™ll love it. Sloanâ€™s only flaw? They spell â€œmeterâ€ the Canadian way! 4.5/5
KRAMER*TEK*MORGAN Dodge Main (Alive) I was thrilled to receive this rockinâ€™ package from Motor City legends Wayne Kramer, Deniz Tek and Scott Morganâ€”all of whom, as a former Michigan resident, I am compelled by law to greatly respect and admire. You should too! Recorded in Hollywood last summer, this too-brief but fully crackinâ€™ set features a smorgasbord of Michigan rock covers, including classics by the MC5, the Sonic Rendezvous Band, Iggy & the Stooges, and Ypsilantiâ€™s own Jimmy Cliff! Records featuring former Radio Birdman bigboy Tek are extremely hard to come by, so let me assure you: This disc is bomb, not bogue! (Obtainable from Alive Records, P.O. Box 7112, Burbank, CA, 91510) 4/5
LILâ€™ KIM Hard Core (Undeas/Big Beat) In real life, I spend much of my time selecting â€œcleanâ€ 30-second song samples from records exactly like thisâ€”and I must say the frankly adorable rapper Miss Kim gave me a real run for my money! Despite thematic similarities to the works of P.J. Harvey and the Cranberriesâ€”particularly on such tracks as â€œBig Momma Thang,â€ â€œQueen B@#$Hâ€ and â€œPlayer Hatersâ€â€”Hard Core instead stands alone as a classic in its field. That field, of course, includes the complete works of Adina Howard and any record which devotes time to the actual concept of â€œplayer hatersâ€ in the first place. Incidentally, I like players! 3.5/5